Even before being struck down by ECFS (evil chronic fatigue syndrome) I was a huge fan of these, and now they’re even more enjoyable because I don’t have to feel guilty about taking them. Today was a prime example – wake up, discover you have a sore throat and feel like you went ten rounds with Mike Tyson, get pissed off about having to miss your planned coffee date with your bestest, roll over and go back to sleep. Rinse and repeat until grumpy. In the interest of optimism though what could have been a total write off of a day turned into an extremely pleasant day of rest (Jesus would’ve been proud). If I were in charge of the country duvet days would be a legitimate reason for not going into work, or shirking that party you didn’t want to go to anyway. Doesn’t America have mental health days? I say duvet days are an extension of that. Maybe I should join a union.
Anyway. There are certain essentials you will need to arm yourself with in order to completely enjoy your duvet day. You should probably first make sure that there isn’t anything circled in red on your calendar that you just cannot miss. Your wedding day would be a good example of a bad time for becoming one with your eiderdown. The day you’re supposed to be a pallbearer, perform brain surgery or collect someone from the airport, also not so convenient. Otherwise though you’re good to go. Next you will need to check that you have enough food and drink stocked in your kitchen to last you the day. Of course the invention of the phone and the internet mean that now there’s very little that you can’t call out for as long as you’re willing to spend the cash to get it delivered at short notice, but it’s easier and cheaper to have provisions to hand before you begin. You will need a comfortable bed (because bed sores are just not a good look) and plenty of fluffy pillows. You will probably want to put your phone on silent so as not to be disturbed. It might even be worth your while calling your nearest and dearest ahead of time with the threat of a good flogging should they interrupt your ‘me’ time.
If you’ve managed to sort all of the above, sit back (or more accurately, lay down) and enjoy a whole day of doing as little as humanly possible. I promise you’ll enjoy it.